My last life blog got me thinking more what next. Well that's the million dollar question isn't it? There's thing that I wish would have turned out different, like my gypsy rose I really hurt that girl and I think about her almost every day . But I knew from
The onset I was toxic for her she was a ray of sunshine and I was an abysmal abyss of self loathing trying to put as much alcohol and pot in me as could be consumed before I blacked out in utter oblivion silencing the voices in my soul telling me to destroy that which I found beautiful or genuine in any way. And before I could hurt I dumped her with a rather beautiful poem and I think it broke her heart. But no more than mine, I didn't sleep with her and I didn't touch her except for a kiss, and in that kiss I felt a desire for somthing that i couldnt give at that time " more" and it killed me to let such a beautiful thing go but if you love it set it free kept reverberating in my head. In this I hope that life finds her better than she would have been with me.
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